‘…the Tax Man beat even Santa to our bonuses, as he has done or will do to yours.’
YESTERDAY, all my colleagues woke up in sheer anticipation.
It’s been our experience every 12th or 13th of the month to check our mobile phone bank apps on or about 6 or 7 a.m. to see if the first half of the month’s pay has been credited to our accounts.
In fact, my SRCC team (SRCC stands for Sustainability, Risk, Corporate Affairs and Communications) has been used to announcements from me (“6:01 a.m. na – Wala Pa!”) that let them know when their account balances have been “augmented.” I’ve been doing this announcing fairly regularly that on those rare occasions that I fail to do so (I could be on a plane to somewhere) my teammates actually worry – not for me but for their paycheck.
Yesterday, though, was special. It was special because we were told we would see a bigger than usual number in our accounts, as our yea rend bonuses were to be credited at the same time as our mid-month. For the week or two past, folks were inquiring: “How many months’ bonus are we going to receive?” Without being able to squelch that speculation, managers had to go through the process of giving year-end ratings to their teammates. The ratings were then recalibrated for the company, and yesterday was the final step – the actual payout of the bonus.
As I sank into my chair in the Mabuhay Lounge of Philippine Airlines at the Puerto Princesa airport, a colleague who I will hide behind the alias Darien cryptically remarked to me: “We can start the countdown, sir.” I think he saw a puzzled look on my face because he repeated himself: “We can start the countdown, sir.” I had to ask, “Countdown to what?” and his reply enlightened me. “It’s 5:54 a.m., sir. Six minutes to the bonus.”
Told you – yesterday morning was special
Conscious of my role as team barker I kept one eye on the big clock on the wall of the lounge while doing my Sudoku. At six a.m. I logged into my mobile bank apps, looked at my account balance then sent out the message on Mocrosoft Teams: “6:00 a.m. Wala Pa!”
Maybe they’ll do it at 7 a.m., “Darien” (seated across from me) remarked.
At 6:55 boarding for our flight to Manila commenced. I always board last, so I loitered around the departure gate. The clock was ticking slowly towards 7. Right before they made a call for “all remaining passengers” it was 7 a.m. I checked my balance again and sent an alert: 7:00 a.m. Wala Pa.” Then I got on board.
It was 8:30 when we were flying over Cavite that messages started to pour into my phone which was not on airplane mode. As soon as the signal was stable, I checked again and then sent an alert: “8:35 a.m. just landed in Manila. Wala Pa Din.”
The same happened at 9 a.m. And at 10 a.m.
Finally, at a little past half past 11, I noticed a message from “Darien:” “Sir, pumasok na ang sahod.”
By coincidence I had also just sent out a terse message to my team “Pumasok Na!” and I could imagine the range of emotions sweeping the 20 of us in my SRCC group.
Though I cannot say who received the message with a shout for joy or silent prayer, one thing is for certain: when they find out how much tax was deducted from the gross amount of our bonuses, curses will be the primary (and maybe the only) emotion.
Because yes, the Tax Man beat even Santa to our bonuses, as he has done or will do to yours.
So you better watch out, and try your best not to cry!
